Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Did you have to Alice?

So...here is where I have a dilemma. I shouted out to the world my coaching yesterday. Was I being cocky thinking I would pass?...maybe. Was I asking for your support?...yes. Did I realize that once I told everyone that I would have to announce the results either way?...hmmm shut, I didn't think that one through.

So...here it goes. I enjoyed my time with Martha yesterday on the phone. Half of the time was a chit chat about me which was so cool...then I launched into the coaching and Alice decided to show up. I was techinically fine as a coach...but I didn't exude cofidence...which is what I've been struggling with pretty much the whole time I've been doing this. This is like on So You Think You Can Dance when the judges say you ARE GOOD but you don't know it yet. So Martha said "You have all the skills to be a great coach all you need to do is believe it". And with that her prescription was "more time in the cockpit" and dissolving my limiting beliefs about my coaching (especially coaching important people). I get a 'do-over' when I feel that I am ready to "represent" as an awesome coach who KNOWS that I am good. In the meantime, I'll be logging some "flight time" and hiring a coach.

All of this is good, all of this is right. I am so glad that Martha called my bluff and didn't 'just pass me'. I needed this kick in the pants to clean up my thinking about myself and what I have to offer to the world. As much as it sucks not to be able to announce that I 'passed with flying colors', I am glad that Martha has high standards. This push from her could possibly 'launch me faster' into the space that I hope to be sometime because I'll have had to really sit with myself and acknowledge who I am, what I want to be and how I will share that as a LEADER...not a wishy washy namby pamby (my words not hers). I am licking my wounds a bit and hopefully can snap out of it...but I am also "on it".

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