New Career

Yesterday, I was called upon to make a presentation to the parents of our school. I'm OK with the ad hoc, stand up and tell what's going on kind of public speaking (no slides just a quick rundown). This time, there was a nicely prepared PowerPoint prez (not created by me) that I needed to give facts, info and be persuasive. This kind of speaking I've not done since circa 2000. Let's just say I was a tiny bit stressed about this, but in a good way not in a "paralyzing-curl-up-in-the-fetal-position" way. So all day yesterday, and even in my sleep the night before, I was thinking, reciting my 'lines' and just making sure I was somewhat prepared. My one big issue is that I am NOT GOOD at following a script (so I guess Steven Spielberg won't be calling me- darn). When I get up in front of the audience, my mind decides to loose information but allows me to make a coherent presentation that may or may NOT cover all of the facts. So, at this point I'm saying my new mantras..."It's all good....It doesn't f-ing matter (sorry mom) and PERSEVERE". Then, I was hit with a brilliant addition to my speech...A JOKE! So, here is where the new career comes in. Maybe I'm a comedienne (yeah right!).

Here is how it played out. I introduced myself as the new 2008-2009 president of the PTSA and then proceeded to say..."Who knows? You may be looking at a future Vice Presidential candidate for the United States"...chuckles...then a serious Indian man (from India) in the front heckled...."you'll need to start wearing lipstick"...then I countered "You're right, I'll need to do some work like wearing more make up and definitely lipstick". Chuckles...and then I'm on with my boring speech. It was a great opener and it made the rest of my time up there bearable for me. So, I had to do the same boring speech again (as they had broken the school up in two sections). This time the principal had run long and I had little time (and they had little patience) for my schpeel...so I got up there, rapidly did my speech, yadda, yadda, yadda (or maybe more like the mom from Peanuts mwa, mwa, mwa mwa, mwa). Then as everyone got up to leave I said; "Wait! I have to tell you my joke from the first session"....so I did, and then there were more hecklers. Some of the Japanese mom's said "you need glasses"....I said, "yes, I have some work to do...a parent from the last session said LIPSTICK would help too"...laughs and whew it was over.

It WAS all good! And, I am proud of my 'whit' (as it were). Hopefully, I also presented myself and my cohorts on the Board as approachable, not-so-serious and maybe they'll want to give their money and time, just like my boring presentation said.