Never thought I could

Today I had my first session with my new coach from my class. I presented my dilemma and it boils down to my relationship with money, confidence and so on and so forth (that is between her and me thankyouverymuch). Anyway, she took me through a tool which involves making your issue a 'thing' (as in a metaphor for your actual issue). I knew she was going down this path and my mind was open but I had always thought that I did not have the mental capacity to 'go there' and imagine something that wasn't there and to give it characteristics and to have it do things and have it even tell me things. I've always said "I am a rational being".

I want to get value out of my coaching sessions and I wasn't about to try to 'avoid this' or not 'try it out'...so I took a deep breath, closed my eyes and went for it. I stumbled sometimes especially when it came to asking my object to speak to me and tell me what it wants me to know....that was tough, I never was able to have it speak but it did lead me to things (through my coaches encouragement). It was very cool and very enlightening because when she reiterated what I had said but using money instead of my creature as the object, it felt like I could change my perspective about it. I'm sure you're dying to know what my mind came up with (and if you're not, you can click the little red X in the top right corner of this screen).

Money in my mind was a fish-like creature that isn't big or small. It is a bit amorphous (more like a jellyfish) and kind of goes with the flow in the water. I was a scuba diver observing the object in front of me. I wasn't scared of it. I reached out to touch it. It turned out to be more malleable than I thought (I thought it would be more solid like a stress ball). I asked it to take me where it wanted me to go, so I grabbed on and we floated up to the top of the water and the "fish blob" bounced and floated on top. The fish offered for me to sit on top of it so that we could ride the waves. I felt safe but did feel that I needed to hold on in the rough waves or I might fall off. We rode up a big wave and safely made it down. It was fun. We then rode the current until we made it to shore on a clean, light, warm lovely beach. I got off and the fish blob remained there and I had this feeling that it would be waiting for me when I needed it again to ride the waves.

In all of this "metaphoring" I never was thinking about what I was saying and how it related to money...I was quietly observing my mind and what the "fish blob" was telling me. My coach was prompting me to observe, to touch, to ask, to see what it did next, where does it take me?, how do I feel?, etc. There were moments when my 'rational' mind wanted to stop playing, but I would breath and she would take me back into the "fish blob" experience. It was very cool, very enlightening and a very valuable way to take my left brain (Mr. Rational) and move to the right brain (Ms. Artsy Fartsy) and see money and my relationship to it from a different perspective. The download of all that I said and felt can then be reformatted to represent my relationship with money (or how I might want my relationship to be) and move with that. I am by no means done with this topic....oh Lordy no! But, I've done a tiny chipping away at the behemoth beast of my thinking about it so that eventually, I will free my thinking up so that I get to a healthy, loving, supportive relationship with money and/or confidence (or whatever my other issues are).

How cool is that?